Dear Boyfriend,

I'm sorry for hurting you once again. I didn't mean to hurt you. It kills me inside each time i hurt you. I've always had these thoughts running in my head, why am i not being a good girlfriend? Why am i always being so hard on you? Why can't i be more understanding? Why can't i even listen to you? Why do i always show you my freaking ego? Why can't i sacrifice just for you? Why can't i be more appreciative enough? Why can't i think about your feelings for once? Why do i always have to hurt you? I've been asking myself all these things but no one could tell me the answers to it. I've always dreamt to be your best girlfriend you ever had. Sometimes i think that i'm not good enough for you. There's loads of things that i am lacking of and i'm trying very hard to be the best for you. But all these things needs time. I know i've been hurting you and driving you mad over and over again. But you love me still. I know you have done a lot for me. You sacrificed everything just to see a smile on my face. I know i haven't been doing my part as a girlfriend. That shows how lousy i am. Baby, don't you think you deserve someone better than me?

People always think that we're a happy couple but they don't know what lies in our relationship. Arguments, arguments and more arguments. That's what we had for the past few weeks or maybe last month. Yes i know it's part and parcel of a relationship. And do you know that trust is also a part of it? You might be thinking that i haven't been sacrificing for you but you were wrong. I've done some sacrifices for you but i guess you couldn't see it. I'm not trying to be calculative here but i didn't want you to think that you were the only one who made sacrifices all this while. Each time we argued, it has always been my fault. Yes, it may be true. But have you ever ask yourself if you did any mistakes before? I'm not trying to say that you always put the blame on me. But sometimes i think that you always try to find my fault. Baby, no one is perfect and i know you're not expecting me to be perfect either. But just one thing i ask from you, don't be too hard on me. By being too hard on me, you're making me stress. You hate to see me in that state don't you? You always expect things to go your way. I know it's for my own good but sometimes you need to be understanding too. And you can't always expect things to go your way cause life is always unfair.

Just give me time to change and i'm sure we could make our relationship a perfect one. Thank you for tolerating with my ego and nonsense all this while though i know it's hard for you to tolerate. I need time to learn more about relationship. Especially on how to make it a perfect one. And baby, don't stop telling me what to do please? It makes me think that you have wash your hands off me. Or perhaps you really don't give a hoot about me anymore? And i don't wanna drag this any longer. I'm afraid it will tear us apart. Neither of us wanna lose each other. All i need now is time. Time for me to change and prove to you that i can be the bestest girlfriend for you. And i hope that you could give me some space to decide my own things. I apologised if what i just said hurts you. I just wanna let you know that i love you still and will always love you. You are the best boyfriend i ever had so far.